Furious Zug-Zug

This is why I love Women’s Studies.

Also I need to recruit some people to cosplay the breakfast club with me.

Also Claire and Allison are my OTP.

That is all.

shizui:

fighting haters by moonlight

winning fans by daylight

don’t need sailor scouts to help fight

he is the one named kanye west 

FIGHTING HATERS BY MOONLIGHT. YES.

therapsida:

missvoltairine:

dailymurf:

You literally just described how you understand that words can remind someone of something in a completely different and unrelated context but still think that means a person is sexualising domestic violence? Are the words dominance, power, control etc inherent to domestic violence? No. They were triggered into BDSM thoughts by the WORDS. THE WORDS. Not the situation, not the trauma, not the person’s suffering. How DARE you say a person in this situation is sexualising domestic violence. Do you not think that people who have suffered domestic violence are capable of finding those words positively triggering of their BDSM sexual habits too? Regardless of where they’re used?

This person never stated it was the most important thing they took away, that’s your assumption. That’s a website specific to BDSM, where people talk about BDSM things. Am I sexualising children when I hear the phrase “good girl” around parents and children? No. Words reminding a person of their CONSENSUAL sex life that is UNRELATED TO THEIR CURRENT SURROUNDINGS is not fucked up. People finding legit hotness in domestic violence situations and distress and trauma after watching a scene of it or experiencing it in real life and wanting to carry out that non-consensual violent act is fucked up.

If you can’t understand the different between words reminding people of their sexual preferences and a person finding the an actual scene of domestic violence arousing, it’s your issue and you can fuck right off with your shaming.

Did… did you even read the OP? The context was ENTIRELY about domestic violence. Actual domestic violence. They were in a child and family development class. You cannot fucking separate the words from the context like that, especially when the context is fucking domestic violence.

“Power and control”, “domination”, etc are very common words used by people IN THE FIELD of domestic violence intervention, shelter, etc work. What is skeeving a lot of people out here is that the OP didn’t seem to be able to stop interpreting things through the framework of their fantasy life when an issue as serious as domestic violence was being discussed. That is the issue. I mean, idk why the OP was in a child development class in the first place, but having spent some time in the field of survivor support work and crisis intervention, I’d be SUPER uncomfortable working with someone who I knew was incapable of switching off or ignoring their lizard brain in the context of dealing with the issue of domestic violence. That’s not me “shaming” - I could literally not care less about anyone’s kink - but it is a major sign of immaturity and a lack of respect for the seriousness of the situation when someone is studying domestic violence and going “oh tee hee power and control those words are so hotttt”. And yes, I would feel the same way if it was someone vanilla getting off in the same class due to some random mention of something that reminded them of their sex life.

Just because you’re kinky doesn’t mean you don’t have just as much obligation as every other person to not act like you’re a fucking 14 year old who can’t keep their raging hormones in check long enough to recognize when something is a fucking inappropriate thing to turn into a reference to your sex life.

Bold mine

Just

JESUS THIS SHOULDN’T BE SO DIFFICULT

Another golden post.

missamberly:

neutered:

missamberly:

BDSM Problems, PLEASE stop making the kink community look bad. 

PLEASE. 

^^^^^^^

THIS

they’ve done this a couple times now where they post a submission that is way more a “hey you’re kinda fucked up” problem than a bdsm problem and they actually refuse to post LEGITIMATE PROBLEMS and i just

i

just

Legitimate BDSM Problem: 

Trying to explain to your doctor that you got your bruises in a consensual, loving fashion, and that your partner is NOT abusing you.

Illegitimate BDSM Problem: 

Not being able to tell the difference from a Rape-Play scene and an actual fucking Rape. 

Also this^

There are a lot of “problems” listed on that blog which are not actual problems. Like getting awkwardly turned on in a non-sexy context is not exclusively a kinky person problem. Vanillas do that too. But for some reason this has been making up most of their blog posts lately, and it’s honestly very tired. Like everyone who has a libido gets turned on in awkward situations; don’t believe me? Go to a high school they’re a fucking hot spot of awkward arousal situations. Instead the implication from this blog is that these are things only kinky people experience, and thereby makes it look like we have bizarre and uncontrollable sexual appetites.

Exactly zero of these problems are relevant to my day to day experience as a kinky person. My BDSM problems consist of the paralyzing fear my family will find out about my kinkiness; fear of my sorority sisters finding out; trying to incorporate BDSM ideas about safer sex practices into adult, yet vanilla spaces and being ostracized, shut down and shamed for it; vanilla people crashing play parties and putting the kinky people in attendance at risk because of their antics; having to fucking hide my toys constantly because my apartment complex officials like to come in with scary regularity; feeling uncomfortable sharing my experiences in the community in feminist spaces; hearing one of my favorite and most highly regarded feminist role models condemn BDSM; and worrying about my ability to have mobility in the field I want to work in and yet still stay an active member of the kink community.

Very rarely do I see these problems represented on this blog. It’s a bunch of superficial bullshit. 

therapsida:

dailymurf:

trigger warning for mentions of domestic violence and paedophilia

The notes on this post are making me and my sub gf vom. Do people not understand that  the fact OP heard certain words and thought about them in relation to something that ISN’T DOMESTIC VIOLENCE means they’re infact not a sick fuck and are infact simply reminded of their kinks in ways that aren’t relative to domestic violence? It wasn’t the domestic violence or the trauma that reminded them, it was the words. Words used in BDSM aswell as in many other areas of life. Terms like dominance, power and control can be heard in english classes, psychology classes, gender studies classes and in those situations will remind a person with kinks/person into BDSM in exactly the same way. It doesn’t mean that people into BDSM are messed up and can’t take serious issues seriously AT ALL.

Saying that people into BDSM are fucked up in this situation is tantamount to saying those into BDSM who enjoy calling someone/being called a “good girl” and being reminded of this when parents say things to their children makes that person into BDSM a paedophile which is clearly NOT the case.

If a person into vanilla sex posted something about how they were reminded of their sexual habits in an odd situation, there’d be no shitstorm at all on here. None at all.

Tl;dr - sort your stigmas and ignorance out with BDSM as a non-kink person.

Oh my god this is such a clusterfuck I can’t

It actually doesn’t matter what you’re turned on by necessarily? Whatever, it’s an involuntary reaction. Call it Pavlov’s dog collar. What you, and a lot of Tumblr’s BDSM people, seem to be missing is that the fact of your response being involuntary doesn’t absolve you of any relationship with or responsibility to the surrounding moral framework, full stop.You can say, Listen I only hear these words in a sexual context 99% of the time, so when I hear them in any context elsewhere I think of sex. Fair enough. You’re still sexualising domestic violence.You’re still posting on the internet how the most important thing you took away from a class on domestic violence is your sexual arousal. And that’s still so fucking gross.

PS I don’t know you and you don’t know me. Don’t fucking assume my status about anything, and especially don’t try and absolve yourself of responsibility by assigning me Oppressor status and rationalizing your immediate dismissal of criticism. I could say more but a) it’s 100% none of your goddamn business b) I don’t owe you shit and c) I actually have boundaries?

Beautiful post is beautiful. All of this^^